I Would Like to Thank the Academy

As all of my fan know (thanks, mom), I entered the prestigious annual Crotchety caption contest. I was determined to win the non-prize this year. I even bullied asked some funny, influential bloggers, Suzy and Random Chick to help me out. Thanks sistas! 

As it turned out, I didn't even need the help. I hope I wasn't too cocky in my acceptance speech:

Yes, yes! In your face, losers!!! I won. I'm better than all of you! It's been brought, bitches!!!

Oooops! I forgot to use the royal "we"

-HRH Momjeans

PS-Still waiting for our millions. Left a message for the guy. He must be busy. (inside joke)

PPS-We hope you all brought your lunch boxes, 'cause we're about to take you to school if da old man has another non-prize winning contest!!

As long as we didn't sound immature and self centered. 

Anyway, we would like to thank Da Old Man for the following award! 

You are really too kind! I wonder who might win the next, "The Soccer Mom is F@$%ING Hilarious Award"? Hmmmm...

PS-Da Old Man was not consulted nor informed that he bestowed this honor upon me in any way whatsoever. 

Update-I forgot to put, "award" on the bottom of my award. I was on a break from my job as a brain surgeon and was hurried!