Here's the deal:
At least in the US, there are are so many places where it would be perfectly appropriate to serve booze, yet they don't. Movie theaters, for example, while I have to sit through the Hannah Montana movie for the second time in a row. It should be mandatory in this circumstance. However, the AMC rent-a-cops don't see it that way. Don't ask how I know this, I just do. Also at sports arenas, amusement parks, day care centers, church camps, while carpooling, and the list just goes on and on. It almost makes me feel ashamed to drink in these venues.
Just kidding! Not really.
Why do we live in such a strict police state? Alcoholics are persecuted in "the land of the free". We are not allowed to openly practice our lifestyle choice. I'll bet there are people in North Korea getting loaded while doing Tai Chi or some shit like that. I'm sure there are even people in Iran enjoying a beer or two while pretending not to make nuclear weapons. And don't start with me about the Russians. They start their kids on vodka in kindergarten. I'm pretty sure I read that one time on Wikipedia. Europeans even get to order beer at their MacDonald's!! That brings a new meaning to the happy meal! Bastards!
Sorry for the diatribe! I guess I had a little venting to do.
Anyway, since alcoholics in the US are totally oppressed, we have to be creative in our clandestine drinking. So, this is MY great idea!
Ladies and gentlemen! I give you, "The Wine Rack".
Pure genius! Big boobs and tons of booze. Everyone wins in this situation! Why didn't I think of it sooner?