WARNING: Election Day Vitriol

I hope you don't mind that I vent for a minute here. Election day is here already! I can't believe it! This whole process has just flown by!! I only wish that I could hear about these candidates over and over and over again for another year.

I can't tell you how sick I am of this whole thing. I'm glad we get to vote, get it over with and move on. I will not miss everyone giving me their two cents about their stupid views. If you think you will change my mind, you're an asshole. Shut up already. No one cares what you think! Oh yeah, and you can take your election yard signs and shove them up you ass while you're at it. Excuse me, Susan Sarandon, but no one gives a shit about how you're voting.


The other thing that pisses me off about this shit is that before I've had a chance to vote in California, the news is already telling me who won. As soon as the polls close back east, the election is over as far as the media is concerned. It really makes me fell like I'm a part of the process! Goddamn election!

What about Hawaii? They are Americans too as far as I can tell. The election is over before they even wake up! Sort of. Well, if you had a big night the night before and you sleep in until one o'clock in the afternoon. Americans like to party on a monday night sometimes, even if they live in the red headed step child of the states like Hawaii.

Thanks for letting me get that out of my system! Sorry if I sound a little grumpy! Now, I'm going to get my, "I Voted" sticker and go around and see how much free stuff I can get. I know Krispy Kreme is giving free coffee to those of us wearing our stickers. Does anyone know of some other freebies?

I love all comments, but if you try to tell me how to vote, I will take your laptop and shove it up your ass. Know this.

UPDATE: One more complaint. You know those yard signs that say, "The Jones Family for McCain" or Obama or Nader or whatever? I hate those even more. Who the hell are you to speak for the whole family? Your five year old could be a raging Totalitarian Neo-Marxist with leanings toward Stalinism. Have you ever bothered to ask? They certainly aren't for your candidate. Have you ever thought about how your kid is going to be treated by his friends in morning song circle? Everyone knows that kindergarteners have Stalinist tendencies these days.

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Vered - MomGrind said...

Election yard signs are a pet peeve of mine too.

cIII said...

The Tater was taking each of the Election yard signs out of the ground on our walk last weekend. Republican, Democrat...she didn't give a shit. Just pulling stuf out of the Ground was enough.

I didn't even stop her. Actually I was kinda hoping someone would give me Shit about it.

I had a whole Big Speech and everything.

Melissa said...

I am right there with you!!! I am all for everyone having their own personal views/political choices but 1) don't shove it in MY face and 2) don't knock me for MY choice

Gwen said...

I totally agree. No one should try to change others views and no one should be punished for their views. I am willing to let my politcal preference be known but in no way would I ever try to influence anyone else. AND ~ I will be glad when it's over too. I'm tired of the bashing going on!!! But still glad we get the chance to vote. :)

HorribleLicensePlates said...

Ugh, I hate those yard signs. You are too funny.

Krispie Kreme here I come!

Heinous said...

Strangely I have an aversion to yard signage as well. It's almost over though, take heart. We can go back to being normal (for us) in no time.

Dr Zibbs said...

Starbucks is giving away 12 oz coffees.

Anonymous said...

I'm going to take all of the election campaign signs in my neighborhood and ram them up some politicians ass later tonight to celebrate!

Tommy Buettner said...

Just think everyone!!! tomorrow is the first day to start campaigning for 2012!!!!!



Aw shit, Kirsten, that laptop you threw at me HURT!!!

DeadRooster said...

As Dr Zibbs wrote above, you can get free coffee at Starbucks--not that you need any more coffee at this point. LOL

Queen-Size funny bone said...

I am very glad it is almost over.

TheFLy said...

I vote for more rants like this, haha.

dizzblnd said...

That was a hilarious way to sum up how just about everyone feels about this whole freekin election. You had me rolling.
I know of no freebies.. (sorry) but I am going to sneak into my yard and pull up my signs before you stick them where they will have to be surgically removed.

ReformingGeek said...

Yep. Time for the bonfire of election signs. It's windy here today so most of them are on the ground anyway.

I can't wait to watch all the coverage tonight. If we think talking about the election was bad, just wait until everyone starts whining that there candidate didn't win/was cheated/etc.

Kirsten said...

@vered-So I'm not alone in this!

@ciii_Nice work! I like your thinking!

@melissa-You said it!


@horrible-I hope the krispy kreme was good!

@heinous-What is normal? :)

@dr zibbs-I'm going to be very caffeinated today!

@random-Good idea! Do you mind if I steal it?

@tommy-LOL! Let that be a lesson, mister!

@deadrooster-You're right, but it's too late now!

@queen size-Me too!

@thefly-Thanks!! :)

@dizz-If you leave me a comment, I won't shove your signs up your ass. :)

Kirsten said...

@reforming-I know! The whiners are getting ready!

Don said...

"...a raging Totalitarian Neo-Marxist with leanings toward Stalinism." But wouldn't that be the same as the sign that says "My 5 Year Old Is For Obama!"?

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

here here!

Kirsten said...

@don-I guess I know who got your vote. :)

@petra-Thanks gurl!

Diva Ma said...

I feel ya! I was out with a friend today at Monkey Joes with the kids and she overheard one of the young teen worker say he voted for McCain. She said "excuse me? did I just hear you say you voted for McCain? Why? Are you crazy?" I was mortified! I mean that is that boy's choice! You cant take that away from him! His right!

Thanks for joining TELL IT LIKE IT T-I-Z tuesday!

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

Yo, I can't even get the free shit. I voted at like 11am and they said they didn't have any stickers. When they told me, I just kinda gaped at them, like they told me that Walmart was closing it's doors due to bankruptcy. WHAT?? NO STICKERS???? So much for a free Krispy Kreme. Guess I'll just have to get fat tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

I'm always late on commenting! Dammit. But I FEEL ya on living in Cal. and getting totally screwed because my vote doesn't count as much as Ohio voters apparently because their faster.

Oh yah, I'm putting up my tagged meme up on wed. :)

Mulled Vine said...

On behalf of the rest of the world, let me say that we are thrilled that its over. ;-)


I voted for the chicken sandwich for dinner last night. My kids voted for corn dogs.

They lost because this house is more totalitarian dictatorship than a free republic. They may have taken the popular vote but in the end it didn't matter. :)

Bill said...

Personally, and from the view of a Canadian, I really enjoyed your election. Drama, comedy, pathos, it had it all! Mind you I'm still glad ours only take 30 days :>)

buffalodick said...

I only discuss politics or religon when threatened...

Harris said...

hey kirsten,

this could be a case of "i'm a idiot" but I dont see nutin here for me...unless you consider every post by yourself to be a gift.

rock on,


GumbyTheCat said...


A vote for Gumby is a vote for CHANGE!

Catnip in every yard!
Cat poop around, but not in, every litterbox!


*koff koff*


The cat made me type this.

eve cleveland said...

For the next election, you should invent a yard sign where folks can easily delete the losin' team. Then just click, drag and paste on a winner, or edit the html, if they are savy enough to know how. You could have a family break down. Why not include the pets and household help? How many awkward moments would that save?

HumorSmith said...

Wow...how should I approach this? You don't think I'll read your blog unless you blogroll me? You are not wrong, but I hesitate to say it for fear of sounding petty. Not Tom Petty, just petty.

I agree with you about the election/campaign. Enough already, although now that the loony left has emerged victorious, I may have to blog under an assumed name to avoid a jihad from Sarandon and Robbins.

So blogroll me already, you saucy wench!

HumorSmith said...

Holy monkey! I combined my response to 2 blogs into one response. My initial comment about blogrolling was in response to your comment about Tiggy.

That's it...no more martinis while I blog surf and comment.

And do us drinkers a huge freakin' favor and get rid of that %$#@*&&^% word verification thingy. It's tough enough to do when I'm sober.