Important Safety Information! Please Read!!

After my disastrous attempt at vacuuming the stairs the other day, I have been very interested in black eye prevention. I googled, "black eye" and found some interesting information. First of all, when I typed in "black eye", Google, being very politically correct, said, "Do you mean "African American Eye"? I clicked on that and found out there are ways to prevent this condition. This is for real:

Black eye prevention.
* Wear the appropriate protective gear for any athletic or work-related activity. This will help protect against not only black eyes but also other serious injuries.

* Wear goggles or other eye protection when working, doing yard work, or other hobbies and sports to help prevent all types of eye injuries.

Who knew?

Normally I would think that this guy was just a dork, but now I know that he is simply preventing a potentially painful condition. Although, I didn't read anything about pulling your pants up all the way to your boobs preventing anything.

I see that this gentleman is actively preventing a black eye while enjoying some shopping at Wal-Mart.

I'm considering the helmet below because it has the added safety feature of a strobe light and horn. Now, everyone will know I'm coming and can prepare to give me a safe environment.

I also found a safety suggestion for Chat Blanc:

After shopping for hundreds of helmets, I finally ended up with this one. Thoughts??